E-Views with Boomer

An E-View from the happiest place on Earth

I couldn’t believe the E-mail I got from a friend, Wabigbear “The Wedge” had actually nailed down a job at Disneyland! This grabbed my attention like an ant grabbing a crumb. What was it that could have brought this way big bear all the way from tropical Brazil to sunny California to "The Happiest Place on Earth"?

A press package from Disney arrived at my door and soon all my fevered questions were being answered. Included inside was some sort of news release written in crayon, and attached was an 8 X 10 glossy of Wagi himself, in all his fuzzy glory! I KNOW HIM, I shouted to my echoes in this empty room, hey, I know that bear!

Reading the strange looking newsletter my eyes opened wide in surprise. "It seems there had been a 'head-liner' bear in the big anniversary celebration show at Bear Country that came down with 'problems', and had to be whisked off to the Imaginers shop for intensive bear care. Here it was time to start the big 50th anniversary celebration at Disneyland and their lead bear was down!"

The story continued past a chocolate smudge and juice stains...

"A frantic call went out around the world from the Disney folks about this "Bear Necessity" casting call that must be filled. Our dear Mamma Bear was out due to health concerns and apparently ALL bears in America are environmentally protected and can’t be forced into sweatshops anymore. That left only the "World Famous Wabigbear". A call was shot to Brazil and franticly they relayed to the Bear their sad predicament. “After all”, they said, “this is for the anniversary blow out, and we gotta have a bear!” Wagi graciously agreed to do this "for the little people...", and packing his bags soon was singing and dancing with abandoned glee as the crowd roared their approval at the Bear Jamboree in Disneyland! " I brushed the crumbs from the newsletter and made a decision...now was the time to see if what the newsletter said was true...

I rushed as fast as I could get there and was soon pacing the corridors of Bear Country in Disneyland, looking for my famous friend. Hearing music I found an unlocked window and I soon was in a darkened theater. Peering through a curtain I witnessed a strange sight...there was Wagi on stage with a full cast of animatronic bear putting on a show!

After the curtain fell I made my way through the back stage door and soon I had treed the bear right where you would expect to find him, in front of a mirror! He had a nice dressing room and was shocked when he answered the door that for some reason had MICKEY written across a star on the door...

Wagi:	BOOMER!!! You actually showed up??? Did you see the show???
Boomer:	“Yes Wagi, you were the BIGGEST bear out there, you made me laugh, you made me cry, (when he tried to sing) and you were flat wompin on that old guitar”! Wagi was gleaming after I told him that and when he saw the over-flowing picnic basket I had brought along he was grinning from one fuzzy ear to the other. We threw out the red and white checkered table cloth he had been wearing around his neck and soon we were yakking and growling and spitting crumbs as we tried to demolish sandwiches and cookies while we sputtered out conversation. Why don’t you all pull up a stump and join us as we talk to a 'hugely' famous Bear, well two big famous bears actually, as Wagi couldn't keep from setting right in front of the mirror and looking at himself while we ate!
Wagi:	Well, I'm sure glad you showed up Boomer! The mini-fridge has been empty for almost an hour and I was having a panic attack! (Pass the hot wings would you? Thanks!)
Boomer:	That's why they can't force real bears to work in these sweat shops anymore Wedge, to long between food breaks. The environmentalists really frown on that these days. Lucky for Disney you were living in Brazil at the time. (Watch those hot wings... they are extra hot!)
Wagi:	Yeah, I wasn't sure about this gig, but when my agent Bernie, (also known as Bernie "No Thumbs" from his previous 'employment') called saying they were looking for someone with my caliber of talent...well, who was I to disagree? After all the man hadn't called with a job offer in three and a half years. So I figured 'what the heck?' Carnival was over in Brazil and my calendar was open for a few weeks so why not? Besides, everyone knows I'm doing this from the goodness of my heart, and it also makes a nifty-neat-o charitable tax deduction! Bernie even sent me a pre-addressed UPS shipping label so all I had to do was to climb into the box and have my housekeeper duct-tape it shut...although why the woman went through four rolls of tape and was singing "Happy Days Are Here Again" is beyond me... (You got any dill pickles in there?)
Boomer:	Oh come on Wedge, like you don't remember when you did the same thing to your housekeeper? Not to mention Bernie... and you wonder why this is the first you've heard from him in all that time, duct tape ain't easy to get out of my friend! Carnival is over you said? It may be down in Brazil but it sure looks like you have a circus going on here. (Of course I have Dills, does a bear...)
Wagi:	(interrupting Boomer's train of thought) I thought that duct-tape gag was a blast! And how else was the housekeeper going to get to Paraguay for a vacation? Don’t expect ME to pay for it do you? You know Boomer...the rest of the Bear cast here are obviously in awe of my talents, they only seem to come alive when I turn on the power switch and the curtain opens! Then when the last bow is made they seem to get all shy-like and just sit there like machines...they are afraid to even come near my dressing room! Bless their hearts...I just know they are trying to build up enough courage to ask for my autograph...maybe I'll even give them a discount on one! Yeah, I know...I'm just an old softy! sigh that’s what comes with being an International Mega-Star you know... (Ohhhhh! You brought the 'good stuff'...Grape Kool-Aid...2004! Not a bad year!)
Boomer:	I also am in yawn of your talents big ol bear! You really need a lot of them in this gig where the job qualifications only require you are a bear, not from America, and can move! I would really like to explain to you Wedge about those "other" bears you perform with. But I still remember the time when you were told there was NO Easter Bunny and you were crushed for years. Ate a lot of honey, if I remember right, to get you through that whole traumatic era. So yeah, you're a star and all those other bears are groupies and I am Walt Disney with a cold thermos of Grape Kool-Aid to stain your tongue purple for the next show. (Wagi pours one glass for himself and another for the bear setting next to him in the mirror) Speaking of super stars... Why does that star on your dressing room door say Mickey on it?
Wagi:	That star on my door with the rat's name on it? Yeah, I've tried sticking my name up there using masking tape and crayon, but I guess some souvenir hunter is always removing it. Not sure who the rat was, seems to have been some big shot around here, they got his picture splashed all over the place. The dust in this dressing room was pretty thick, so he must a been some hotshot from years ago...hmmm, shouldn't be hard to replace all them rat heads with my fine profile pretty soon. And I don't want to discuss that Easter Bunny thing...the memories are just too painful...my emotions too raw... (Hmmmm, not bad corned beef there Boomer...this from Murray's Deli over on 34th?)
Boomer:	(That was actually dog food I brought for Goofy Wedge, not corn beef! There goes that connection!) Do you realize just how old that old "rat" is my friend? (Boomer not waiting for an answer and Wagi’s mouth stuffed full of dog food not intending to answer anyway, continued uninterrupted) He was sitting here in front of this very mirror on July 17, 1955 when Disneyland opened for the first time to the public. Long before you were even a twinkle in your ol Grizzly daddy's eyes! Not really rocket science here Wedge, but you are right about one thing, he is a hotshot from a long time ago and news flash here... he still is! In fact I hear there's going to be a blow out like never seen before here at the 'Happiest Place on Earth', celebrating the 50th year anniversary of Disneyland and that old mouse will be leading the parade.
Wagi:	Yeah, I heard something about them throwing some big shindig here for the joint's 50th Birthday. They've gussied up the whole place for a big party. Now, you KNOW I'm not the type to gossip, but I heard tell that even a couple of my favorite RCT sites are going to be doing some celebrating too...did all of you get your comp Park Passes I sent you?
Boomer:	Absolutely! How else am I gonna afford to get in this place, they've fixed the fence since the last time I was here.
Wagi:	Good. They were just laying there on the table, so I figured I'd mail them out to everyone... (What's this? Aack!!! Green Salad with Low-Fat Dressing??? Boomer, how could you??? You KNOW I'm allergic to health food!)
Boomer:	Yup, I wonder what the members of both sites, rct2.com (now the RCT Space Network) and RCT*Mart are going to think when they find out that both sites are teaming up to join in this huge celebration. I know the staff at both sites have been working hard on this secret project for quite sometime now.
Wagi:	Well, ol' Edna Mae just e-mailed and said her and Margo were hitching up the Airstream trailer to the back of Margo's '68 Caddy and heading out now in order to get here on time for the big get-together. I just hope she doesn't embarrass me here...the woman has no tact or manners you know... BURP...and that little frumpy friend of her's, Margo, well I think she's been drinking grape Kool-Aid that been 'aged' a little too long, if you know what I mean... (Turkey legs! Hmmm, you got any mustard for those?)
Boomer:	(Oh you mean THOSE turkey legs; I thought you were starting in to talking about Edna's dog again. And by the way you're sitting on the mustard... at least I HOPE that is what that mess is!) Edna Mae's coming here? (Boomer straightens his two strands of "comb over" hair, coughs and clears his throat) Edna Mae is sure a large woman huh Wedge, but a very handsome one too don't you think? In human standards I mean, little puny for a Bear of course.
Wagi:	Well, to each their own I always say. Margo's afraid to fly you know, so that's why they decided to drive out. That way they should get here about the same time as everyone else from both sites do. Hopefully she'll keep that little mutt of her's muzzled this time, he's quite the yapper, just goes on and on and on and on and on, on and on... darn near never stops for a breath I tell you! And she better have him on a short leash too...I still don't have total feeling back in my left leg after his amorous little greeting at the ORCA/RCT*Mart Awards Show got out of hand... (These cheese-flavored or sour-cream and chive?)
Boomer:	(grabs bag out of Wagi's paws...) they are not any flavor for you. They are for Mickey Mouse when I see him. Not you OR Edna Mae, you can have the rice cakes Mrs. Boomer packed for me. Now about Edna...
Wagi:	Oh don't get me wrong, ol' Edna Mae is alright, just a bit full of herself if you ask me. (PAPER napkins Boomer??? Rough PAPER on THESE lips??? I don't think so! Hand me your sweater...I'll use that...)
Boomer:	(Pulling off his sweater to give to his old friend as requested) Omim onfi ogle myer... (Wagi helps pull Boomers very small sweater over his very large head)... I said I hope Edna and company don't have to face the same problem that visitors had to face clear back on opening day at Disneyland.
Wagi:	(Taking a moment’s break in the eating frenzy as his fuzzy ears went up with interest at what Boomer was saying). What kind of problem could there ever be at The Happiest Place on Earth Boomer? While Boomer sat back rubbing his now full stomach, Wagi spotted a very interesting looking piece of cookie and vacuumed it up as Boomer closed his eyes and thought back to what he had been told by his dad so many years ago.
Boomer:	Wagi… It was July 17, 1955... Day one at Disneyland! The cars stretched bumper-to-bumper for seven miles on the Santa Ana Freeway, in what police at the time called, "the worst traffic jam ever seen." It was a Sunday and the contingent of first-day invitees was on its way to Anaheim where Walt Disney, known for his creative genius in the motion picture industry, was about to unveil a whole new concept in outdoor, family entertainment... his dream of Disneyland! Six thousand tickets for the occasion had been given to the staff at the Disney studios, 28,000 people had packed the park by days end, as many counterfeit tickets had been made and sold to many. Attractions broke down, there was a gas leak in Tomorrowland, a power outage in Fantasyland, restaurants had ran out of food and the freshly poured asphalt on Main Street, USA was so soft that it stole the high-heeled shoes right off MANY a female guest. Today "Black Sunday" seems a distant memory of the magical land that Walt Disney built. He said in his dedication speech nearly 50 years also; “To all who come to this happy place; welcome! Disneyland is your land. Here age relives fond memories of the past... and here youth may savor the challenge and promise of the future. Disneyland is dedicated to the ideals, the dreams and hard facts that have created America... with the hope that it will be a source of joy and inspiration to all the world." Boomer opened his eyes to see just how much he had impressed his furry friend with his recollection of the past. But as Boomer opened his eyes he noticed Wagi's eyes were closed and fluttering, keeping time with his snoring, fast asleep, bread crust still hanging out of his mouth.
Boomer:	(shaking the Bear) Hey wake up Wagi! I was talking to you about something!
Wagi:	(opening his eyes with a snort Wagi smiled at the discovery of food still in his mouth, swallowed and spoke taking up right where he had left off.) Any-ole-ways, I've got a lot of planning to do yet...check that everyone got their Park passes, touch bases with RCTNorthwest about the big Convention, plan the big dinner for all the staff from both sites here at Disneyland when they arrive... no offence Boomer, but planning a REAL meal is hard work! It's not like tossing a week's worth of groceries in a picnic basket like you just did, I mean I want a REAL meal there...you know, a King's Buffet-type REAL meal! (Tater Salad! Oh! And Deviled Eggs! Pass the Tabasco Sauce would you?)
Boomer:	The last Kings Buffet style meal you went to it was rumored (although never proven) that you ate the meal AND the King too! I've tried to tell you, you need to look at what you're cramming in your mouth; do you think that Kings just grow on trees? (Wabigbear looks guilty at Boomers stern reprimand, but just for a moment as he catches site of some treasures in the picnic basket that had escaped his eye until now) You are right Wedge; there is a lot to do. The staff at both sites involved in this have been working hard to get this whole thing ready, make all the plans and get packed and get here. The planning on this event was started as a joint effort clear back in February of this year. Before I left to go chasing after Bears I was in a staff meeting that involved the entire staff from both sites, the main topic of that meeting, indeed the ONLY topic of that meeting was the discussion and concerns we ALL had about the fact that YOU were getting this big dinner together for us here but by the time that WE all got there you will have eaten all the food! I TOLD them not to worry, I would be here to keep an eye on things and that is when they really got worried, as far as I know that meeting still rages on. Looking at how empty this basket is getting, and this is just a snack for you, I would say they may have something to worry about. (Hey, easy on the Tabasco and egg products, you know how that causes you gas, those other bears in there can't get away from you ya know!) Besides eating and singing, what else have you been up to Big Bad Bear?
Wagi:	I tell you, I've been one busy bear lately! Day after day I'm on the go...catching a nap at the RCT Space Network, then over to the 'Mart, then after they kick me out it's back over to RCT Space...I barely have time to keep to my meal schedule anymore! And now this gig here at Disneyland...hey, what can I say? I'm just a giver you know... (Ohhh! Give me another one of them ham sandwiches!)
Boomer:	You aren't the only one that‘s busy! I was glad to get out of the office though, my friend and was assigned to this event. They have a water cooler over at The RCT Space Network staff room that causes some VERY strange effects. I'm not upset that its there, I was however more then upset when Scoop up and kidnapped it and took it to Canada on a business trip with him to help keep him "warm"... he said. I figured there wasn’t much to keep me there after that and so... here I am. Enough about me though, I came here to Interview YOU. If you can even talk with that whole sandwich stuffed in your mouth.
Wagi:	(crumbs and ham pieces flying around the room like mosquitos in a blood bank, wagi replies) What do you want to know about me Boomer? It's all spelled out in my "Official Wagi Biography" ($24.99...available at Amazon...). Well, I guess I could share a few things with the cheap ones who won't invest in my book. It's the usual story...handsome, talented, learned bear is born in humble surroundings in the Great Northwest...bear escapes to find his calling...calling runs away and hides...bear meets Brazil...Brazil closes it's borders...just another story on that ole big blue ball we call 'Mudder Earth'. Of course it's just waiting to be made into a Major Motion Picture. At first I envisioned Kevin Costner playing me, but the man needed hair extensions for Waterworld.
Boomer:	I can't even imagine that.
Wagi:	Well can you even imagine what he'd need to portray my furry behind in a thong? Although I do think we share similar profiles despite the fact that Spunky claims that Mt. Fuji's is closer to mine... (Peanut Butter and crackers? This better be chunky Boomer...) Boomer hands Wagi a jar of peanut butter mumbling under his breath something about the Wabigbear being the "only thing too chunky around here". I'm sure they'll quickly come to the realization that only I can play ME...after all, I was born for the part! (Root Beer? Well I hope you remembered the ice cream for a float!)
Boomer:	Only YOU would want to play YOU! What, was I supposed to pack Ice Cream in napkins or something? The Carnation Ice Creame Shoppe that was over on Main Street USA, that was so famous and popular, is now gone. So drink your warm root beer bear and pretend like Kevin Costner is now your housekeeper and is sploonking down a large kachunk of Vanilla Ice Cream in it... You DO have a housekeeper don't you?
Wagi:	Well of course I have a housekeeper! Doesn't everyone? They don't? You don't? Well then, who cooks for you, irons your under shorts, scrubs your toilet and sweeps up your toenail trimmings for you?
Boomer:	Umm, my wife? You must have forgotten she is REALLY good at using a frying pan!
Wagi:	Oh, I forgot...you're married! Hmmmm, I've seen the results of Mrs. Boomer's... 'cooking'... What end of a frying pan is she the best with; the north end or the south end?
Boomer:	(with conviction) Its when she comes from out of the West that always seems to hit ME the hardest! Soon a digesting quiet filled the room with only the biological gurgling sound coming from both man and Bear. Wagi had settled back and assumed the nap position and was just starting to drift off to sleep when something Boomer was saying brought him wide awake. Wagi had just mumbled to Boomer to wake him 15 min before the next show when Boomer sprung this news on the big bear.
Boomer:	The food is gone and I've got something to tell you! The Bear Jamboree is over, its long gone! You came to the wrong place! This isn't even supposed to be your dressing room!
Wagi:	Boomer, the food CAN"T be gone, I'm still hungry! And I think you may have shared the company of Mrs. Boomer’s skillet to many times, what do you mean I went to the wrong place?
Boomer:	Just relax Wedge and let me explain it all to you. You see its like this. In 1971, the Country Bear Jamboree opened to an enthusiastic response as one of the original attractions of the Magic Kingdom at Walt Disney World, Florida. In 1972, the Country Bear Jamboree opened in Disneyland as the centerpiece of the park's newest land, Bear Country. Wonder Bread replaced Pepsi Cola as the sponsor in 1975. Strangely, Henry the bear continued to announce, "Just refrain from hibernating'... and we'll all enjoy the show, cause we got a lot to give!" -- a reference to Pepsi Cola's 1969-1973 slogan, "You've go a lot to live, Pepsi's got a lot to give!" A seasonal show, Country Bear Christmas, premiered in 1984, and returned regularly during the holidays. In 1986, Disneyland's Country Bear Jamboree "went to Yesterland." A new vacation-themed show, the Country Bear Vacation Hoedown, replaced the original show. The attraction's new name was Country Bear Playhouse. There was no sponsor. The bears continued to perform the Country Bear Vacation Hoedown at Disneyland until September 9, 2001. The Country Bear Playhouse went dark forever. The bears were evicted by a short and stout bear, the highly popular Winnie the Pooh. Having successfully evicted Mr. Toad from the Magic Kingdom at Walt Disney World to make room for the "Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh" ride, Pooh Bear decided to do the same to his ursine brethren at Disneyland. Actually, Disneyland has not yet officially announced that a Winnie the Pooh ride is replacing Country Bear Playhouse, but this seems to be the worst kept secret in the theme park business. You can still see the Country Bears perform at Walt Disney World and Tokyo Disneyland. So you see Wagi, you must of came to the wrong place. I think you were supposed to go to the Disney WORLD in Orlando! There is no more show here.
Wagi:	(laughs so hard he almost chokes on a wayward crumb) Boomer... oh Boomer, you do need some help don't you? (laughs again and replies much to Boomers chagrin) You just said in your little Bear Country history lesson that the playhouse bears still perform on SPECIAL occasions.
Boomer:	And your point is?
Wagi:	Boomer, how much bigger of an occasion can you get then the 50th Anniversary celebration of Disneyland AT Disneyland?
Boomer:	(turning very red with embarrassment) Oh!
Wagi:	(Speaking more to himself in the mirror then to Boomer as he started putting on his stage makeup) Here's some Bear Necessities news about Disneyland that I guess you didn't know Boomer and no, neither one of us is at the wrong place. (Wagi, thinking the lip stick had a unique fruity flavor promptly ate it and with a very red mouth, tongue and teeth continued) Although its true that they shut this old Bear Jamboree playhouse down for good on September 9th, 2001, the Disney folks have kept it up and in good working order and open the doors still to this day on holidays and special events... this would be one of those events. I would be one of those bears. (tasting the eye liner, Wagi spits it out in disgust, a rare display indeed.)
Boomer:	Ah ha! Now I get it. When Winnie the Pooh moved in (Wabigbears fuzzy ears go up) and they closed down the playhouse, THIS became Winnie's dressing and makeup room. Winnie the Pooh had become the new "King Bear" in these here parts...
Wagi:	Until I got here (snapped the Bear) Now we "rule" this theater together As soon as I save up enough old cardboard boxes to cut letters out of I'm putting MY name up on the Playhouse Marquee too! (Wagi lowers his voice and says to Boomer in confidence) Just between you and me Boomer, I think that Pooh Bear has been dipping in a honey pot from the nectar of a different bee, know what I'm saying here?
Boomer:	I can SMELL what you're saying here... here's a mint, Bear.
Wagi:	(swallows mint whole) I mean THAT bear can't even walk straight, lost his pants years ago and hasn't bought anymore since, has a little red shirt waaaay to small for him and then goes out in the public that way! I mean, where's the fashion sense? Where's the Movie Star look? (Where's the dessert???) Why, I'm surprised they haven't locked him up. (anymore desert mints Boomer?) Then they go and stick ME in here and tell ME I have to "share the facilities" with a drunk Bear with a severe honey problem in a dressing room so old it still has the name Mickey on the door. They really aren't paying me enough for this gig Boomer! Now you're trying to tell me all my supporting cast are 'machines'???
Boomer:	(Laughing) He's not drunk Wedge, that's the way they made Winnie the Pooh. Just be glad you even HAVE work for the first time in three in a half years!
Wagi:	It’s not work Boomer...it's ART... (Now... I just have enough time for a light snack before rehearsals start again...where'd that ham go?)

Interviewing the big bear had been quite an experience for me. One good thing was I was leaving the Playhouse with a lot less then I had come here with. I stayed for the next show and was very surprised at how good of a job he done. Except for the fact that he stopped to pick his teeth twice and his nose once and the fact that he stopped during a song to scratch his back with his twangy guitar, it still went quite well. As well as you could expect from a non-union bear working with a bunch of robot bear wannabe's.

The show was over. As I left a still munching bear and the Bear Jamboree playhouse behind and strolled through the many wonders that make up a magical place called Disneyland, I marveled at my luck and good fortune to be a staff member at The RCT Space Network. I get to travel and do reviews for the site all over the world, but this is the place I really wanted to be.

I have the privilege of spending many days and nights here at Disneyland, all paid for by Sambo, doing E-Views and writing reports about this upcoming Disneyland 50th golden anniversary. I will have more from Wagi and several other E-Views coming up from various spots throughout Disneyland during the celebration and from what I’ve heard in the staff room there are going to be some VERY interesting things coming up from both sites to join in and be a part of the Disney blow out, you WON”T want to miss any of this.

Well I got to go send in my E-View and expense report to Sambo so I will do that, BUT if you are coming to Disneyland this summer, swing by the Bear Jamboree Playhouse in Critter Country. Bring a very big picnic basket with you filled with LOTS of food and when the show is over slip backstage and gently knock on the door with MICKEY MOUSE written on it in faded letters and when the door opens and the Wabigbear that is standing there sees what you have for him he will make you feel welcome, very welcome indeed!

But if you CAN”T make it to Disneyland just follow along and join in with us as the staff and members from two RCT sites join together to bring to you all the highlights and pageantry and magic of Disneyland decked out in the glorious splendor of the 50th golden anniversary of a dream come to life by a very special man named Walt Disney, 50 golden years ago. Remember, this is not THE END, this is just the beginning!

From the happiest place in the world, goodbye for now from Boomer and the Bear.

Written by Boomer and Wagi.